💤 Why Sleep Challenges Are About More Than Sleep
If you’re in a season of broken nights and bleary mornings, I want to say this clearly: you’re not doing anything wrong.
Sleep challenges are part of parenting—but they aren’t just about sleep. More often than not, they signal a deeper shift. A call to reevaluate what’s working, what’s sustainable, and what boundaries might be needed for everyone in the house to feel more supported.
This week on The Nurture Network, I had the joy of sitting down with pediatric sleep coach Ella Hanover, who helps families build healthy sleep routines with compassion and clarity. And one thing we both kept coming back to was this:
When sleep isn’t working, what families really need isn’t just advice—it’s a plan.
Sleep as a Signal
Sleep is often the first place parents begin to realize that parenting isn’t just reactive—it’s intentional. It asks us to pause, reflect, and respond with care, not just urgency. And that’s hard—especially when you’re exhausted.
Ella and I talked about how sleep is often the first moment parents are asked to hold a boundary. To consider:
What does our family need?
What do I need in order to show up with calm and consistency?
What kind of rhythm or routine would support everyone’s nervous system?
These questions can be overwhelming in the middle of the night or during a nap strike. That’s why having a plan matters so much.
When you feel like sleep struggles are spiraling, a clear plan gives you something to lean on. It creates safety, not just for your child—but for you.
Parenting as Leadership
Another powerful insight Ella shared is that sleep isn’t just a physical need—it’s a parenting moment that invites us to lead.
And that doesn’t mean being rigid or “tough.” It means stepping into your role as a grounded, calm, attuned guide. It means making decisions from a place of intention rather than guilt or desperation.
When we hold a consistent bedtime or create a new routine, we’re teaching our child that the world is safe, predictable, and that they can trust us. We're modeling boundaries, care, and resilience.
Your Needs Matter Too
We also talked about the inner conflict so many moms feel: wanting to respond to every cry while also desperately needing rest.
Here’s the truth:
Wanting sleep doesn’t make you selfish.
Prioritizing your needs isn’t neglect—it’s necessary.
When we stop seeing sleep as something we “should” be able to push through and instead treat it as a shared family need, everything changes.
You deserve to feel well. You deserve to feel supported.
And your child benefits when you do.
🎧 Listen to the Full Conversation
If sleep has been a struggle in your home—whether you’re just starting out or years into the journey—I hope this episode helps you feel seen and supported.
Ella shares:
Why sleep is often the first real parenting boundary
How to create a plan that reflects your family’s needs
What it means to lead with love and clarity
Practical encouragement for parents in the thick of it
🎙️ Listen now on The Nurture Network:
💤 Connect with Ella here: www.ellagracesleepsolutions.com
You’re not alone in this. There is no shame in asking for help, making a new plan, or wanting something to change. Sleep may be where the challenge shows up—but it’s also where healing and clarity can begin.
With so much care,
Jess
P.S. If this hits home, forward it to a friend who’s parenting from the heart and could use a little reminder that she’s not alone.
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Lovely read!